Kennyblog Redux

I'm psyched about two things. First, that the first post on my new blog has absolutely nothing to do with what I had intended this thing to be about. Second, that the first post on my new blog is entitled SMUT. Good times.

So, a few weeks ago, I did a reading at galapagos art space at their weekly Smut show, run by Desiree Burch. The thing that I read has been sitting in a text file on my laptop's Desktop for a while, and I really really want to delete it; however, I think it's funny, and I want to make sure that there's a record of it somewhere. So I'm posting it here.

So, I'm here starting this new blog. Because all the cool kids are blogging. I sort of already had a blog, kind of, except it was more of a place for me to write essays, about my living situation. That can be found here, and there's some stuff in there's that's just plain amusing. But probably pretty long (you know, as opposed to my first entry on this blog, which ran about 15" of screen). This is something different. Something special. Someplace for me to bitch and complain on a more regular basis. I'm hoping for once a day. I realized that every single day I interact with people, and since (a) I'm not very good at interacting and (b) most people are difficult to interact with, these interpersonal scenes end up being either uncomfortable, bizarre, or amusing. It's my intent to record these interactions for posterity here. I'll start paying attention tomorrow.

This is about an interaction I've been having with transportation. It's a little bit of a cheat, since I didn't actually have it recently. But there's no reason for you to know that.

I've been living in the city for about 5 years. In that time, I've had to take a lot of cabs. I've even taken a fair number when I didn't have to, but was just too damn lazy to do anything else. I'd say 3 is a fair estimate for the number of cab rides I take during the course of a week. So, given that I'm in the city for 50 weeks a year, taking 3 cab rides a week, my five years in NYC leaves me with a total of about 750 cab rides. Since I lived in Queens and Bushwick for a while, lets assume that 20% of those were in livery cars, yielding about 550 rides in certified yellow cabs.

You know how the names of the cab drivers are posted in the cabs, on the sneezeguard behind their heads? Never once, in any one of those 550 cab rides, have I been able to ascertain the order of the names that appear on that information sheet. Last name, first name? First name, last name? A couple of nights ago, I was in a car with Ally, and the name of the driver was Ricardo Ricardo. It made me laugh, partially because I'm an asshole, but partially because I've been thinking about this for a while now, and that one just made it seem like the TLC was flipping me the bird.

UPDATE: I don't know, maybe this post makes me sound like an ethnocentric tool, but when I was taking a cab home from buying a new office chair, I read the name:
Bah
Mamadou

I'm going to change the name of this blog. 'Interactions' is too limiting. Also, I realized that I didn't actually interact with very many people over the course of the day. Certainly not enough to do one post every day. So much for intentions.

Maybe I'll call it 'good intentions.' Or 'early failure.' Any ideas?

I was sitting in the car with my mom the other day, and she was talking about something or other that she wanted. It being my mother, there's a 50% chance that it was a foot massage (this is, evidentally, a genetic thing - there is nothing I want quite so much as a foot massage. At least, nothing that I can pay for. Legally, anyway). In any case, I said something to the effect of:

"Well, mom - you are a woman of means, and as such there is nothing preventing you from just going out and paying for this thing that you want."

To which my mother replied: "The reason I am a woman of means is that I am frugal, and watch where my money goes very closely. If I just went out and got anything that I wanted, I would no longer be a woman of means."

This is brilliant and (like many brilliant things that do not involve the concepts of fusion or the like) obvious. I was going to use this as a stepping stone to my bitching about how much BBEdit costs, and how that cost is preventing me from buying it. But instead I think I'm just going to leave it as it stands, and go buy TextMate instead.

This is still an Alpha blog. Which isn't to say that this blog pees on the most trees, or is destined to be dragged down by a stronger, younger blog years hence. But rather that this blog is not yet in Production. The URL hasn't been given out to any but the most understanding of alpha clients, I have not promoted this blog in any place (of course, when we move to production, I don't really see me doing any promotion either. Maybe a link on my old blog, which as far as I can tell was only frequented by a couple of ex-girlfriends, and a hot internet acquaintance of mine from Middle Tennessee State (I just visited a picture link that she sent me a while back, of her surprisingly Tri-Force-like tattoo, and find that it's gone. However, it's replaced by a host of screenshots from World of Warcraft, making her hot AND nerdy (and therefore really hot. Nice).

My point is that as of the writing of this post, the name of this sucker isn't fixed yet. And I wanted to keep this post as a list of names that I'm considering:

• Good Intentions
• Early Failure
• Relentless Convenience (this one I got from a blog linked by Gawker)
• Node895 (or should I not make the name of my blog a Drupal joke?)
• Probably Not Updated
• Shower Licker (in honor of my cat, who jumps into the bathtub whenever someone takes a shower and licks the moisture off of the tile. Kind of weird, really)

Maybe I'll just go ahead and call it kennyblog, redux. Yeah, I think that's where we are with this.

Hey! Look at this! Akamai releases a BitTorrent client that's a Firefox plugin!

Wihch is great, except now I'll feel really guilty if I use it: every time I bounce Firefox to get back some of the RAM it's using, I'm decreasing the total bandwidth of the swarm, making everyones download of The Wire Season 3 some Creative Commons-licensed music go that much slower. I'm such a dick.

Also, I'm never going to get a Gawker link with this sort of post. Next post: something snide about Alec Baldwin!